Nirvana
by Nintendian
Summary: He was going to tarnish the angel once and for all. - Naoi/Kanade.


**Author's Notes:** This story is pretty twisted, but it's always how I imagined the relationship between Kanade and Naoi to be, with their very contrasting personalities. I really do adore this pairing. The thing is, there is hardly anything about these two, both in the anime and on this site.

You don't know how much I love Angel Beats.

Warning for sexual situations. This probably shouldn't even be rated M but I'm just going to be on the safe side... I didn't even know I had the ability to write M-rated stories...

* * *

><p><strong>Nirvana<strong>

...

Naoi always watched Kanade from a distance, because he knew he could never get too close to her. At all times, there was a flock of sycophants following her, surrounding her, protecting her not because they were her friends, but simply due to the fact that she was president of the student council. They wouldn't allow him to so much as approach Kanade, let alone exchange a brief word with her.

So he found himself observing her instead, carefully scrutinizing her every move.

.

.

It didn't take him long to figure out that her favorite food was mapo dofu, but that she liked spicy foods in general because they appeared on her plate every night at dinner. He couldn't for the life of him imagine why. Kanade would sit alone at the table closest to the cafeteria doors and eat calmly, like the mouth-burning, tear-jerking meal didn't bother her at all.

When she could, she always sat in the second seat of the classroom, the one next to the window. She would chew the eraser of her pencil whenever she was thinking deeply. During break and her free time, she retreated to a quiet, secluded place at the other side of school to tend to the garden she had grown there, watering the plants and flowers and humming with a pretty, content smile on her face. Sometimes she would even go for a walk along the river.

.

.

Kanade always looked so happy, so peaceful. Naoi couldn't stand that about her. Actually, he detested almost everything about her—the way she seemed so at ease with her surroundings, how she obtained perfect scores on all her tests, how she was every teacher's favorite student. She was so freaking flawless, she probably regarded herself as superior to everyone else. Someone with morals, someone who had never sinned.

Whenever he saw her, he had to resist the urge to wrap his hands around her neck.

He would show her, all right. Show her that she wasn't nearly as high and mighty as she thought she was, that she was just as lowly as the rest of them.

Nevertheless, he couldn't ignore the desire flaming in his heart when he caught sight of Kanade's gracefully flowing hair, her slender figure, her porcelain skin. He wanted to ravish her and cut her throat at the same time. Maybe he loved her. Maybe he didn't. He wasn't sure of his own feelings, anymore.

When it all came down to it, Naoi couldn't tell if he hated her or loved her. But one thing was for sure—he had to find some way to get closer to her.

.

.

Later that year, he became the student council vice president. Kanade, of course, was re-elected for president.

The principal called their names proudly, blabbering on and on about responsibility and leadership and other things Naoi couldn't care less about. All that was going through his mind was that he was finally standing next to Kanade, thinking that he just had to reach out a little and he would be able to touch her like he'd always dreamed of.

.

.

The first time he talked to her, they were shaking hands at the first council meeting and introducing themselves while the other members looked on around them. Secretly, though, Naoi wished they were alone. Her hand was so soft, smooth. He never wanted to let go.

"I'm Kanade Tachibana," she said in her quiet voice that reminded him of the tranquil, flowing water of a river. But then again, he already knew her name—he had known for months after she had first caught his interest. He smiled his best professional smile and hoped he didn't look too eager.

"Naoi Ayato."

.

.

He knew she wouldn't ever do anything wrong, because that's just how she was: impeccable, pristine, a goody-two-shoes at heart. She probably hadn't even raised her voice before. Well, Naoi would fix that. He was going to tarnish her once and for all, and he would enjoy her agonized screams—he would _savor _them.

So one day, he raped her in his bedroom.

To his disappointment, Kanade didn't scream. Didn't even struggle. She just quietly submitted to him like she did to everybody, and he tore into her, greedily, desperately, like his life depended on it.

It was like she was his prey, like he was a wolf and she was a lamb. And that wasn't so far from the truth, he realized, because of the two, she _had _always been the virtuous one, the innocent one. The one with a pure heart, clean hands that were untainted until now.

Now, she was no better than he was.

The night passed as a blur, rending Naoi numb to everything but a sadistic sort of triumph. When he'd finally stolen from Kanade all the satisfaction he wanted, a slice of golden sunlight was peeking out of the gap in his curtains, the room shades lighter, signaling that it was daybreak. Their clothes were strewn randomly all over the floor, hers ripped where he had pulled too hard. She gathered them up without a word and slipped out of the room, silent tears falling down her cheeks.

And all he did, all he could do, was laugh. He laughed uncontrollably, hunched over on his knees, his own tears pooling on his bed and soaking the pillows.

Because the angel had finally fallen from grace, plummeted from her exalted seat in heaven to join the rest of them down below.


End file.
